Work can be challenging, but when your boss yells at you, it becomes a whole other level of stress. You’re not alone if this has happened to you – studies show that about one in four employees have dealt with workplace conflict in the past year, with yelling being a common issue.
So, what should you do if you find yourself in such a situation? Here’s some practical advice to help you navigate the stormy seas of workplace conflict.
First, know that being yelled at by your boss is not acceptable, even though it might be legal. A study by the Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development reveals that those who put up with such treatment usually experience lower job satisfaction and a decline in mental and physical health. “Yelling at employees is humiliating for them, decreases their self-esteem, and puts them in a state of fear and anger,” Jon Gordon, author of The No Complaining Rule, adds.
Step back before you react. Objectively assess this situation: Was it a one-time deal, or was it part of a pattern of behavior? Are others being treated this way, or is it just you? It’s important to document these incidents. Write down the date and time and what happened, including any witnesses. You might need this record if you ever want to report the behavior to HR or even to file a lawsuit.
Even if you have decided that you need to address the problem, remember that this must be done calmly and professionally. Raise your concerns with your HR department. They should be able to help mediate and counsel you. In serious situations, you may want to contact an attorney who specializes in labor laws to help you understand what you can and cannot do.
Sometimes, no matter how hard you try, things may not come up. You may want to seek new employment in this case. You should job search before you quit to make a smoother transition for yourself and less of a financial burden. And if you do decide to leave, don’t do so unprofessionally – businesslike; turn in your managers or supervisors a formal resignation letter and don’t speak negatively about your boss or the company.
You might wonder if it’s ever okay for a boss to yell. While leaders like Steve Jobs and Jeff Bezos were known for their outbursts, these are exceptions, not the rule. Jake Young of the CIPD points out, “Line management training should be a priority for employers, so managers can foster more positive relationships in their teams and address any conflict early on, before it has a chance to escalate.” Effective leadership involves motivating and inspiring, not intimidating and belittling.
What if the tables do turn around and you happen to be left yelling at your boss? It’s also important that you professionally handle the aftermath. Take your time out to cool off and self-evaluate why you got upset, then apologize when you are ready. You should say something like, “I want to apologize for blowing up on you earlier. That was uncalled for, and it won’t happen again.” Then you can schedule another meeting, if needed, to discuss the problems that caused you to act that way, but this time coolly and in a professional tone.
What matters is the learning from such experiences themselves. Keeping a tab on your emotional intelligence and communication would help one handle conflicts much better in the future. There are so many books, courses, and professional guidance from a career coach.
Ultimately, regardless of whether you decide to stay and fight or move on to greener pastures, remember your mental health. There is no job worth sacrificing that. If you feel like you have tried the best medications for a toxic situation, it is quite all right to take care of yourself by moving on. Just make sure to do this protecting your career and personal growth.
Dealing with workplace yelling is not ever easy, but with the right strategies, you can sail through those turbulent waters onto calmer, more peaceful, and productive work environments.